Yes, I'm alive ...

I’ve just been working, Christmasing, working, writing lists, working, actioning lists, working, writing more lists … I had an email at work from the shark who suggested the following list:

jools to do list.

• go home
• blog
• make a list
• go to bed

This is what I actually did:

• Finished up the project plan I was working on
  I’m hoping that at some point I’m going to start liking my job … I hope the reason that I don’t is just because it doesn’t take care of itself yet in the way that my previous jobs did. If I concentrate hard on being fair to myself I guess I’ve only been doing it 6 months and I did join a company which is in the middle of changing direction so trying to establish any kind of order is a bit like building on quicksand. However, added to that, there has unfortunately been a whole hell of a lot else going on in my life which has meant that, unusually for me, I’ve not had my eye full on the work ball. There’s still no let up in my “life” so I guess liking the job may have to follow on at some point. In the meantime, I have to admit that I’m just “not bothered”, so staying late to catch up is something I have to do but it’s a real chore.
  


• Wrote a shopping list
  Always a tedious yet strangely satisfying job.
  


• Did shopping on the way home
  Honestly, you’d think that the shops were never going to open again … I got the last bag of carrots. They were organic – I tend to buy organic as much as I can anyway, but I knew that there were no ordinary carrots because when I was walking past where they should have been I heard a bloke inform his wife bleakly that there were no carrots left. I nonchalantly sauntered to the end of the aisle and then picked up my pace in the direction of the organic section. I could hear quickening steps behind me, so speeded up myself; the footsteps also quickened. I didn’t quite break into a run (standards!), but fortunately managed to keep ahead of the “wife” and calmly grabbed the last bag of organic carrots from the shelf – phew! At least I know that I’m now assured of good eye sight in the New Year …
  


• Drove ‘home’
  The drive was fine, it was the arriving ‘home’ and getting the shopping, work laptop, bag of tupperware (which had accumulated at work - including the pot that I took the Vodka Tomatoes in – gotta get the new company addicted to the idea of Vodka Tomatoes!) up into the flat. Note to self: when I get my next place it must either be at ground level or at the very highest 1st floor. Life is too short for doing multiple trips up the stairs with shopping (and I’m fit for goodness sake) and I just don’t have time in my life to do multiple shops during the week – it costs more (I always spot something not on my list and buy it, so if the shop only happens once a week then its less costly) and is such a waste of time …
  


• Poured myself a glass of wine, put the radio on, and unpacked the shopping
  


• Looked at the state of the flat and tidied it!
  


• Poured myself another glass of wine
  


• Wrote a list of stuff that I need to do before bed:
  
  
• Sort out jewellery
  For some reason it was all over the place and jumbled. (I’ve still got that single earring … Either someone hasn’t done a tidy up, or it really is lost. I’m going to hang onto it still though.
  DONE THIS MORNING
  
  
• Sort out make up
  Because I’ve been visiting recently and this was scattered between several different overnight bags.
  DONE LAST NIGHT BEFORE BED
  
  
• Sort out paperwork
  I’ve been meaning to do this for months.
  DONE THIS MORNING. I now have a big bag of recycling.
  
  
• What is all that stuff in my handbag?
  DONE THIS MORNING
  
  
• Washing
  DONE LAST NIGHT and is now all dry and put away.
  
  
• Make lunches for next week
  I know this sounds a bit anal, but I’ve got rehearsals every night next week (in preparation for our German tour) and if I don’t plan ahead and have food in the freezer that I can defrost and take with me to eat I just don’t eat … And I am acutely aware that despite my protestations to the contrary (I am a contrary bird sometimes) I have lost weight over the last 3 or 4 months.
  DONE THIS MORNING
  
  
• Dust and hoover flat
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  DONE THIS MORNING
  
  
• Clean bathroom and kitchen
  Have I mentioned my disturbingly pink bathroom?
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Well – its now very clean as well as being very pink …
  DONE THIS MORNING
  
• Blog!
  As you can see, I have done this. All from the comfort of my pink recliner …
  
  


• 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Have a good old soak in the bath
  I’m just off to do that now but have many thoughts to get into order on the whole subject of baths (pink or otherwise)!

Well, I guess that’s all for now, off for a soak with Mr Frog – it’s always good to bathe with a friend!

HAPPY NEW YEAR BLOGGERS!!

My Elf Name Is...

Freckles Fruit Cake

What's" Your Elf Name?

Not quite on the jazzshark scale ...

Happy Sunday

I went to Kew again yesterday afternoon. I enjoyed it as much as the first time but the main difference for me was that now I have my new toy (my new work phone), I have an almost reasonable camera with which to try and capture my favourite bits. There are a few of them below, but I will pre-excuse them by saying that a) the camera is still not that great and b) I’m really rubbish at taking pictures!

The other part of the plan was to try out the ice rink, but it was really crowded and we decided that the pair of us flailing around like windmills in such close proximity to other people was maybe not such a good idea so we chickened out and enjoyed a picnic instead. By then time we’d had our picnic we were frozen to the core, so we retired to a genteel public house for several glasses of Baileys before heading back to the relative normality of Chiswick.

Gardens of Glass
Chihuly at Kew

Exploring pastures new

So, I’ve found my local – The Raven. Not a bad wee pub as it goes. Very nice wine list and interesting menu (partook of wine but not of food on this occasion). It has an eclectic mix of furniture which includes a nice leather sofa over by the open fire which is perfect for sitting and reading the paper to the background sounds of James Brown before heading off into Chiswick High Road to check out the fab butcher and plentiful green grocer stalls.

Oh, and did I mention the “Nearly New” shop? I am now the proud owner of a Jasper Conran black velvet dress which fits like it was made to measure; it’s an absolute classic style, and is “just what I need” to take on tour to Germany next month. The best bit is that it only set me back £69!! However, try as I might I can’t shoe horn the lime green Vivien Westwood evening dress into the “just what I need” category, though it too fits like a glove and is only £79 … I think I’m going to like Chiswick – shame I can’t afford to stay here! Goodness knows how anyone affords to stay here to be honest, but it’s nice while it’s lasting.

In memoriam Violet Bruce (29.2.1920 - 26.11.2005)

• Her infectiously, wicked cackle of a laugh


• A cracking meat pie and pease pudding


• Fantastic baking


• A voracious and skilled knitter


• Sequence dancing with grandad down at The Comrades – they did an amazing quickstep.


• The image of her falling through a deckchair in our back garden in the late 70s! We shouldn’t have laughed but it was very funny – she was stuck for some time …


• Getting worryingly over excited at the wrestling on a Saturday afternoon TV!


• Lots of singing together – daft songs, proper songs and Cushie Butterfield on a regular basis.


• The time she reprimanded my mum for letting me watch "Wuthering Heights" because it had upset me so much I cried. Bear in mind that I used to cry every week at Little House on the Prairie!


• Knowing that I was & always would be her bonny lass.
  
  My Gran. Forever alive in my memories.
  
  Cushie Butterfield ...
  
  I'm a broken hearted keelman, an' I'm o'er head in love,
  With a young lass from Gateshead, an' I caal her me dove.
  Her name is Cushie Butterfield, an' she sells yella clay,
  An' her cousin is a muckman, an' they caal him Tom Gray.
  
  CHORUS:-
  She's a big lass, she's a bonny lass, an' she likes hor beer,
  An' they caal her Cushie Butterfield, an' I wish she was here.
  
  Her eyes are like two holes in a blanket pulled through,
  An' her breath in the mornin' would scare a young coo.
  An' when a hear 'er shoutin' - willya buy any clay?
  Like a candyman's trumpet - steals me young heart away.
  
  CHORUS
  
  Ye'll see her doon Sandgate when the fresh herring comes in,
  She's like a bag full o' sawdust tied roond with a string.
  She wears big galoshes, and 'er stockings was once white,
  An' her bedgoon it's lilac, an' her hat's nivvor strite.
  
  CHORUS
  
  When I asked her to marry uz, she started to laugh,
  "Noo, nyen o' yer monkey tricks, for ah like nee sic chaff".
  Then she started a bubblin an' roared like a bull,
  An' the chaps on the keel sez aa'm nowt but a fyeul.
  
  CHORUS
  
  She said "the chap that gets uz will have te work ivvery day,
  An' when he comes hyem at neet, he'll have te gan an' seek clay.
  An' when he's away seekin it, aall myek baalls an' sing,
  O weel make the keel row that my laddie's in".
  
  CHORUS
  

So, I'm in then ...

I didn't get much sleep the night before I moved, those last bits of packing were quite emotional really. As I was looking for “nick nacks” to take to personalise my temporary flat I came across photos and stuff and the inevitable thoughts of "where did it all go wrong?" were upon me. Regardless of whether what is happening is the best thing or not, I couldn't help the wave of sadness that came over me and stayed with me pretty much until Sunday lunchtime.

The car was packed to the gills - the duvet and pillows that I'd carefully packed into one of those vacuum bags - you know the ones you fill with squishy, yet bulky stuff and the attach the hoover to it and suck the air out so said bulky item miraculously halves in size - dutifully broke its seal and doubled in size again during the course of the journey rendering any vision via the rear view mirror impossible!

I got to Chiswick just in time to catch my window of opportunity to exchange keys with Lou. (I allowed 2 hrs to travel ? miles and it took 2 ½ - the delightful A205 on a Saturday ...) Fortunately that window of opportunity extended to Rupert being a gentleman and helping me carry all my stuff up to the attic flat! Thank goodness he was there to carry my big case - I could manage everything else (PPT would have been proud of me!) but if Ru hadn't have been there I reckon I would have had to unpack that particular case on the street and carry the contents up separately ... Its amazing how heavy, bedding and towels are - don't suppose the 5 books I stuck in there before I closed it helped though!

Anyway, there was in depth familiarisation session with Lou on which key to use in which door (!), a quick trip to Acton to see where I might be able to stash my car when I can’t park outside the flat (the joys of residents parking permits), and then there I was unpacking my stuff into this little cosy haven of mine.

Sunday dawned to the news from my mum that my gran had died the previous night. How weird is that? She’d not been well for a long time, and I guess it was only a matter of time, but the fact that all the “stuff” going on in my life meant I hadn’t been able to get up and visit her mid November as I had planned, made me selfishly sad that I had not managed to see her one more time before she went.

With that news taken on board, I must confess to having had a lovely day to myself. I did my food shopping, completed my unpacking made myself food and had a soak in my ridiculously pink bath with many candles. Content is the word I would use. I swing between that and terribly sad, but I guess it’ll get easier as time goes on.

Don't you love a list?

So, I'm all packed then, in spite of the mother of all headaches for the last 2 days – serious interrupted vision in the left eye, accompanied by numbness on the same side of the face and a serious case of slurring of the words.  You could tell it was bad because I haven’t had a drink in days and I didn’t even manage to get excited about my new work phone – a new toy to play with for goodness sake!  Anyway, here comes the list:

• A bag of boots, well the ones I wear regularly anyway, actually that's pretty much all of them if I think about it (!);


• a case of clothes;


• a case of stuff like towels, bath mats etc;


• a box of items for the kitchen - I do love to cook, so it would be disastrous if I didn't have my favourite knife or vegetable peeler with me for example;


• a Jools start-up general cleaning bag;


• bag of toiletries and make-up bits;


• my laptop - be warned, I have no broadband connection, so any AIM will be via dial-up I'm afraid (How will I cope? Does is work on dial-up?).  Whatever I guess, it’s there for watching DVDs or indeed just noodling on the computer;


• a big bag of books :)


• and some ornamental bits from a creating a comfort zone perspective.

Oh, and did I mention my new DAB radio?  I'm very happy about this. There is no TV in my temporary flat, but I'm not that fussed really. OK I'm going to need GM to record Strictly Come Dancing and Lost for me, but to be honest I've not watched much TV in such a long time that I've kind of lost track of what's on at the moment. Chances are I'm missing a great BBC drama or something, but then I've been missing some great live theatre over the years and have definitely missed some good stuff on the radio, so I'm going to make up for it now!  I fired it up last night and have already pre-programmed some channels – I shared the inaugural listening moment with DAB aficionado BBW and I’m now raring to go.

I’m also up and running on Skype now – I’ve had it for ages but didn’t know anyone else who was on it so haven’t ever used it …  I’ve got 3 contacts now, but as I mentioned above, no broadband anymore!  Damn.  I’ll be able to talk before 0900 and after 1730 UK time, so I’ll keep an eye out for my contacts and if you keep an eye out for me, we might be able to squeeze in a natter before I start work or before I wend my way home.  

Any road up, tomorrow is a new day and a big big change.  Watch this space and keep in touch.

Small pleasures …

I’ve just sewn 2 buttons back onto my “Trinity” coat.  One dropped off last week so was easy to find – I had carefully stowed it in my pocket – but the other one dropped off way back last winter … When I considered the job yesterday I was a bit glum about it because I knew I wouldn’t be doing a full job – 2 missing buttons and I was only going to be sewing on 1.  However, to be fair I was fairly glum all day yesterday!  

It’s been an emotional and tiring few weeks through which I’ve helped by the kindness of friends – curries, drinks, phone calls, emails, AIM, hugs, texts, overnight hospitality, use of washing machines, lovely day at Kew Gardens taking in the Gardens of Glass etc etc. I’ve been very lucky.  So thank you all – you know who you are.

Anyway, much was resolved on Friday night and even though I felt that I shouldn’t really be ‘going out’ I decided to go and see Kurt Elling at the QEH.  Jazzshark had said that it would be a good thing to do, so I followed her advice and she was so right.  I met up with Catster and the Pringles and thoroughly enjoyed the show.  I love his voice anyway but it was great to hear it live; smooth, lyrical and all delivered with an air of effortlessness.  It was a perfect end to a less than perfect day.

Saturday dawned with an overwhelming numbness which was replaced by a definite attack of the glums. Strictly Come Dancing lifted me for an hour but numbness returned fairly quickly afterwards.

Today, however, dawned more promisingly. I’ve had a thoroughly productive day and am happily back to “list writing Jools” – it’s always a bad sign when I can’t even raise myself to write a list!  So, the list was collated thus:

• brunch with the Hausfrau and Catster


• a good old sort through my tax returns and papers delivered to the accountant for cross checking


• shopping


• washing


• ironing


• re-jig of my mobile calling plan (scary last bill at last got me to re-assess my the plan I was on)


• the beginnings of a list of things I need to pack to move into my sister’s flat next Saturday (I love it when the need to write another list appears on a list); and finally


• that job of sewing that single button back onto my coat …

As I say, I wasn’t feeling good about the final item on the list owing to the fact that it wasn’t going to be complete job.  However, just as I was getting my sewing box out of the cupboard I had a strange flash of inspiration and for some reason walked to the shoe cabinet in the hallway and lifted up the magazine rack that sits on the top.  There was the other button.  I have no idea why it came to me that that was where it was, but there it was.  So, the job could be done properly and I now have a coat with all its buttons again.  

As I say, small pleasures …

And then there were three

So first it was the washer.
Then it was the toaster.
And now the iron.

3 broken bits of domestic equipment.  Is it a sign of something do you think?

I'm so easily side tracked ...

So, by way of assisting the shark with a case of a vanishing links panel (fellow blogspotters just need to make the image smaller and everything slots back into place!), I ended up doing this rather cool map of the countries I've visited in my life (didn't bother with the US states breakdown as I've only been to New York and Florida ...) Either way, blimey 17 countries - 7% apparently. Feels exceptionally untravelled of me ...

Right, guess I ought to get back to the jobs I had lined up for this evening before I got side tracked!

Menu
Found fab new wheat free naan bread which I'm enjoying with throroughly healthy spicy vegetables.

Possible Mission?

I was sat on the train last night, enjoying the luxury of half an hour immersed in a book when something caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. To begin with it was just a movement, but as I focused in on the area that had moved, I realised it was a spider, just dangling in mid air. It hung there for a moment, gently swinging with the rocking of the train. Then, almost like it realised it had been spotted it started shimmying back up its thread - a la Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible - until it was back inside and access grid in the ceiling of the carriage.  I wondered what his mission might have been? (You notice that I decided that it was a he but I base that on no knowledge of how you identify the sex of arachnids ...) I wondered if he was just the advance reconnaissance agent, and that there was in fact a team of spiders up in the access hatch with him plotting their next mission down into the carriage? Were they perhaps all going to come tumbling out of the multifarious holes in the panel going 'hut hut hut', US Marines stylie, surround me and wrap me up in web like Shelob does to Frodo?

That would be really scary and would actually fit in with a recurring dream I've had since childhood.  I'm chased by a giant spider that wraps my head in web which then starts to melt me ... (oversharing? maybe ...) Either way, the reason I manage not to let this dream bother me in adulthood is that there are of course no giant spiders.  However, it then started occurring to me that maybe the giant 'dream' spider is just a metaphor for a swot team of real sized spiders who could potentially work together to achieve the same result? Hmmmmmm.

Suffice it to say, I got a grip on that notion and you'll be pleased to hear that I made it off the train in one piece and headed for a calming glass of chenin blanc.  

So, what can I tell you?

Ever had a head so full of stuff that you can’t get any of it out?  That’s where I am at the moment.  If I ever do get to the point that I can blog it however, it will be entirely inappropriate for such a forum; so, I guess the only thing I can tell you is that I’ve had my hair cut...  

I do love having my hair cut – me and Andrew have a lovely natter about life, love and everything really and he does a stonkingly good cut and blow dry to boot.  I’ve got a bouncy, curly thing going on at the moment which feels fab – my hair bounces as I walk!  It’s a bit like that girly thing of swirling around in a long skirt – a very feminine, yummy feeling. He’s really good.  I can’t do this style myself, but then I guess (apart from the good cutting technique) that’s what I pay him for!  That, and the fact that he knows I’m a tight bird and that he needs to cut it in a way which means I only have to get it cut once every four months!

The haircut was followed by the dangerous walk back to the tube past 3 shoe shops. Unfortunately I’m in love again.  Dark red suede, ¾ length, black 3” heel.  £175.  The worst thing is that the one on display was a size 4 – it would have been rude not to try it on!  So I tried it on, I took it off; I stroked it so that the nap was lying all in the right direction, placed it back on the shelf and stepped away.  Sigh …

What a lazy day.

The shopping is done, 3 loads of washing are done – although half of that had to be done at the launderette as the washer (which we only seem to have had for 5 minutes) started emptying water all over the floor during the washing cycle.  Lunch was made and I even got as far as considering my next move on the Pension front - I haven’t actually signed any paperwork yet but at least I’ve read it …  

Then round about 5pm I kind of ran out of steam and I’m afraid I abandoned thoughts of wading my way through the ironing and decided to treat myself to a luxurious soak in the bath with my favourite Fenjal bath stuff, candles, a spot of music and a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon.  It was a thoroughly decadent half hour and happily managed without reaching the pruney stage.  The trouble with a soak in the bath however, is that I never manage to get going again.  Consequently I’ve spent the evening curled up in my jim jams watching Strictly Come Dancing and thinking that if Jim’ll Fix It was still on, I’d write in and ask to be able to partner Anton Du Beke – but then I never got to get dressed up and sit in one of the boxes on The Good Old Days which is what I wrote and asked to do last time (I was young!!), so chances are I wouldn’t get to get dressed up and dance with Anton either …  

Any road up, the pile of shirts that’s still there waiting to be ironed is just going to have to wait until tomorrow morning …

Night, night.

There's nothing for it ...

I left my comb at home yesterday by accident, so at lunchtime embarked on a quest to buy another one in order to reign in my increasingly wild mop of hair.  My mobile rang:

Caller:  What are you up to?
Me:  I’m in Boots
Caller:  What colour?

Am I known for having a lot of boots or something????  I think I may need to buy more shoes to redress the balance …  I like this idea!

Works of fiction

Since I started my new job I've been mainly travelling by car. This is great from the perspective of not being reliant on public transport, which is a pain in South London at best of times, but it also means I both get to listen to music in the car & hear the news. Previously I left the house without having heard any news, I would then work all day - never having time to dip into www.bbc.co.uk like many colleagues I've had seemed to find time for - and by the time I got home I'd have missed the early evening news and had fallen asleep by the time the 10pm news came on (why did they have to change it from 9pm?). I guess you could argue that I could listen to the radio while getting ready for work, but I've just never been able to get ready & listen to radio simultaneously. There's always so much to do: shower, breakfast, make packed lunch, decide what to wear, tame the hair (losing battle at the moment!), put my face on etc, etc.  If I had the news on as well I know I would get distracted and never make the deadline.  So anyway, the upshot is that travelling in the car means that I now have a vague notion of what is going on in the world, and that I get to listen to music.  Marvellous stuff.  So what's the downside?

I never get to read anymore and I really miss it!  In the 5 day gap I had between finishing my old job and starting the new I enjoyed a day to myself going down the Thames to Greenwich. It was a lovely day, I saw the sights, I talked to random tourists, got a wee picnic from M&S, found one of those bookstores which are always closing down and bought a very mixed bag of books for 50p each. That was 3.5 months ago and I haven't finished a single one of them. If  I'd still been going to work on the bus I would have bought another 2 bags by now.

In fact the only work of fiction I've read recently is the timetable for the 196 at my bus stop.  This is demonstrated by the fact that I decided against the car this morning, to enable me a trip to the HITW after work, and missed my train in spite of allowing 25 minutes to wait for bus which is purported to come every 10 -12 minutes ... I'm now going to be 30 minutes late for work (no lunch break for me ...) and the worst part about it is that I forgot the damn book I laid out to enjoy on the journey.  

Ugh ...

Sadly the lurgy has well and truly taken hold.  I’ve been up since 3am with a cracking headache, sore throat and the beginnings of a chesty cough.  The tissues haven’t been pressed into action yet, but I fear that it is only a matter of time …  I think now is a good time for me to re-record my outgoing voicemail message as my voice has now dropped a couple of octaves and sounds a bit Rula Lenska!  Hey, I don’t sound sexy very often, so I reckon I should grab the opportunity while I can!

... and the birthday goes on!

Well the week started with a trip to the seaside with Pepps to have an implementation meeting with a client. Actually managing to get on the train to Poole felt like a day’s work in itself. I was up on time but left the house late so I decided to be clever and drive part way as I had missed the bus that would get me to Waterloo by 0830. I then got stuck in hideous traffic so decided to drive back and get the next bus. I missed the bus. I drove further down the route but ended up abandoning the car and catching whichever random bus I could that was heading in the right direction. Once on the bus I rang Pepps to say that there was no way I was going to be at Waterloo by 0830 (it was 0800 by now and I was less than a mile from home having been traveling for 45 minutes). Pepps says “Neither am I darling. I’ve been traveling for an hour and I’m still in bloody Clapham!” I immediately felt much less stressed! Anyway, to cut a terribly boring story short we rendezvous’d on Platform 9 at Clapham Junction, caught the first train heading in the right direction and miraculously got to the meeting bang on time.

The meeting was a good one. We got taken to lunch, which included enough “curly fries” to feed a small army. I declined to eat them as my instinct was that anything unnatural as a curly fry has got to be covered in crap of some sort of another (see page 6 of this link). We caught a glimpse of the sea, had a wicked hot chocolate in a very seedy teashop, nearly missed our train back to Clapham, treated ourselves to a warm G&T (no ice …), had a fascinating chat about shoes, wet wipes, tupperware and a shared love of Lakeland Plastics catalogues (said conversation was punctuated by strange random sounds from the woman across the aisle who we think was talking in Russian under her breath …), sighed in resigned acceptance as the train sailed through Clapham Junction and eventually wended our way home from Waterloo!

Tuesday started early with lovely presents and cards and moved on to hours staring at project plans and specifications; it’s a shame us grown ups with no annual leave left have to work on our birthdays ... However, the day took a turn for the better when at 4pm there were more cards, presents and special wheat free cake courtesy of the office, plus a glass of fizz courtesy of me! I wasn’t sure how the ‘alcohol in the office’ thing would go down but as it happens it was a resounding success and I think a new tradition has been started. Now all I need to do is persuade the company to foot the bill and gently introduce the notion of vodka tomatoes on special occasions and mulled wine before Christmas lunch and I’ll know I’ve really made my mark! The evening was spent at home with a lovely Bolognese and ice cream courtesy of TH and 2 episodes of “Waking the Dead” on video.

Wednesday saw dinner with Lou in Clapham plus another card and a present – a beautiful sparkly and girlie handbag.



I have no idea when I might be able to use it – come on, someone invite me to a ‘do’ which requires wearing my favourite slinky black dress and my new gorgeous handbag! We had no idea where we were going to eat, so walked up and down Northcote Road checking out all the restaurants and bars. We discarded places like the Slug and Lettuce and All Bar One which were rammed and noisy and just as we were heading back for an expensive Argentinean steak restaurant we spotted what looked at first glance like a wine bar. Closer inspection revealed it to be an Italian restaurant and remarkably seemed to have stuff on the menu which catered for siblings with different restrictive diets. It was also being frequented by more ‘mature’ customers who looked like they were out for the purposes of eating good food rather than just ‘out’, if you see what I mean. Well, we weren’t disappointed. I’m quite difficult to please on the eating out front but this really was a case of yum yum.

Thursday saw my 3 month review in my new job and happily my probationary period has officially been signed off and I received lovely feedback from my boss about my achievements so far. Actually I’ve been feeling good about the job over the last few weeks – I finally feel in control and that I’m winding up to being able to operate at the pace I’m used to, which is important to me, and it was good to have outside validation of my feelings by my boss saying good things about me too. The evening was spent at Darbucka with TH and Catster at Steve’s Peel Day gig. I’ve never been to Darbucka before and I love it! What a lovely venue. The gig was really good too; I’ve not heard Calamateur before and really enjoyed him, Steve was on good form – I really must buy one of his CDs - and what we saw of Rise was also really cool. Fortunately the darkness disguised the fact that I nodded off at one point … What can I say? Steve’s music is just so soothing and relaxing, and that combined with the fact that I’ve been out pretty much every night for a week and am, frankly, getting too old for that, meant that at one point I was gradually sliding off my cushion and disappearing under the table! Unfortunately, we didn’t get to hear all of Rise because being old and sensible meant that we ran to get the last train back to where the car was parked at the shark pad (well I guess its Catster’s pad now really …)

Friday dawned with the unhappy realisation that I’m coming down with some ‘orrible lurgy (hardly surprising as everyone seems to have it at the moment) so I’m now stocked up with Echinacea, vitamin C and zinc, Night Nurse and a good supply of non-scratchy tissues, which will hopefully see me through a weekend visit from the parentals and back into another week at work.

The Menu
Garlic olives to die for; a shared plate of melt in the mouth parma ham, roast artichoke and truffle oil; chicken stuffed with mushrooms, in mascarpone cheese & peppercorn sauce and broccoli; all accompanied by a wonderfully smooth in the mouth montepulciano.

A "no time to blog" digest

Friday:  an evening of tables reserved for the occasion, chips, Pino Grigio from my new mug which is now being kept behind the bar for me whenever I go in- such a classy bird!, chips, good company, chips, lip gloss comparisons (George’s is not as chocolatey as mine apparently, though the debate was quite split on that), chips, discussions on the Vorderman scale (don’t ask …) and a late journey home.

Saturday: an early start (well of course, it’s Saturday!), the weekend’s chores packed into a manic 5 hours, before heading off to Brighton to see Bill Bailey at the Dome.  Very, very funny night and a good choice of birthday treat for myself!

Sunday: a lie in – marvellous stuff!  I slept all the way until 8am, can’t remember the last time I did that.  A day spent with TH’s family, a visit to friends and their new baby followed by cheese and wine on returning home.

Phew!  Back to work in the morning …

Hold up!

They really do! The last time I encountered hold ups they really were a case of fall downs ... However, two things appear to have happened since my last experience

1. My legs must have got fatter (for those who know me, yes honestly!) and


2. They use a much better rubbery stuff at the top which clings to the skin. I'm sure that previously it wasn't as clingy, because last time I tried them my usual immaculate presentation (I wish) was marred by my Nora Batty ankles!

I have an unfortunate history of falling down underwear as it happens. The "fall downs" as mentioned; the garter I wore the day I got married. I could feel it slipping as my Dad walked me down the aisle and by the time I got to the "almost" TH it was in fact round my ankle; and the embarrassing episode of the “bra-less strap” I wore to an 18th birthday party many moons ago. Suffice it to say, I was wearing a loose cropped top and was partaking in a fairly vigorous demonstration of the twist. Next thing I know, I've got an interesting new belt. Everyone saw, so there was nothing to do but unhook it and chuck it in with a pile of handbags. It’s not like I had anything that needed holding up anyway!

Either way, my record on the falling down undies front has been much better of late and I'm pleased to say that there is no sign of falling down today. In fact they're holding up magnificently under the pressure of charging around to get to the station for the 7.39 and the subsequent stamping of feet when I arrived with 2 minutes to spare only to hear an announcement that it had been cancelled ... Aaarrgghhh!

A week of firsts

It’s been a busy old week.  I’ve had a big implementation this week; well it was supposed to Go Live last week, but what with wasting 3 weeks trying to working out what I was supposed to be delivering, having a key member of staff (essentially the only resource I had) announce they were leaving the company just as the project came on line, having to do meetings and specs that I shouldn’t have been doing etc, the week’s contingency I had built in to the already impossibly tight but non-negotiable timeline kind of evaporated …  Anyway, Go Live happened 3 days late but was very enjoyable in a twisted way!  It was almost like running an event again – me in the middle being mission control with a group of people who very quickly metamorphosed into a real team in a way that I’m not sure has happened before.  (Maybe that’s just me being big headed!)  We’re going to need a serious de-brief on the project – lots of lessons to be learned and all that, but I feel that we’ve got a good team and we’re in a good position to build on it for the next disastrous project already on the horizon.  One more difficult and haphazard project to go and then after that all the projects will have been mine from the start so there are lots of new procedures and working practices to put in place and existing processes to get used etc.

This week also saw my first Salsa class.  I’ve been banging on about this for months and I finally got round to it this week.  It was quite funny really.  I was immediately transported back to school when in the 6th form we were forced to have ballroom dancing lessons with the boys from the grammar school.  The girls would line up along one side of the school hall, boys down the other and Mrs Isaac and Mr Blah (can’t remember his name – he was very light on his feet but had terrible bad breath!) would demonstrate the waltz, foxtrot, cha cha, polka or whatever and then we’d have to have a go.  It all felt fairly disastrous at the time – thoroughly embarrassing and all that – but if it came to it I could probably still manage to fluff my way through a waltz or a foxtrot with a guy that knew what he was doing.

OK, so the Salsa class was full of adults and not spotty teenagers and everyone was there by choice but there were still many sweaty palms and a bunch of beginners desperately staring at their feet like they would up and run off if they weren’t kept in sight at all times, and heaven forbid that you should make eye contact with your partner!

The teacher of the beginners’ group was a nice enough woman, very encouraging and all that but she began by counting 123567123567 right from the beginning with no explanation of why. What happened to 4 and 8?  Well I know what happened to them – being a musician obviously helps – but for me the whole 123..567.. thing isn’t really something I think about; if you’re musical and feel the beat, you know which beat you’re on without counting.  However I’m  not sure everyone else in the beginners class realised where 4 and 8 were … It was about 25 minutes in before the teacher explained that you rest on 4 and 8, so it wasn’t until after then that a couple of the blokes who were having trouble with the concept that the “next foot” you use has to be the one that you’re not currently standing on otherwise you fall over, cottoned on that they didn’t just go from 3 to 5 and 7 back to 1.  Happily after this realisation there was much less treading on toes!

I guess the problem is that I’m not quite a beginner, but I’m also not good enough to be in with the intermediates.  However, I know that I must do my scales and arpeggios in order to be able to play the cool stuff I want to …  Sorry, I mean I must practice my mambo, rumba, turn, open out and crossover steps before I can do the fun looking stuff.  I also must remember that I must not lead … ;-)

I’ll go back I reckon, but it would be nice to have someone to go with as everyone else there was with someone they knew.  However, TH categorically doesn’t do dancing, so if I want to do it, it’ll have to be on my own.  I’ve started so I’ll finish!

Friday saw Kenny Young and the Eggplants via a swift one in the HITW.  I’ve been trying to get to see them for years and this was the first year I managed not to be working, hurrah!  TH came too and it was great fun (apart from a really ropey white wine and soda, apparently BB asked for a single malt and was given a Bells!)  They did all my favourites, Eddie’s Apartment, Rambo goes Shopping and Earl the Squirrel and I got a lovely complimentary eggplant badger (sorry badge!) and an eggplant T shirt into the bargain.  A girl can never have too many band t shirts to wear as nighties!  

The menu
Dinner (Sat): Organic chicken breast in a mushroom and stilton cream sauce with steamed organic carrots, broccoli and peas; followed by Belgian Chocolate ice cream laced with a wee bit of Muscat …

What a way to start the day

I’ve had three good starts to the morning this week.  Two were because I got up at the dawn of crack and went to the gym before work; after 60 minutes of good physical exercise and an invigorating shower I seem to feel ready for anything!  Then this morning I came to work on the train (Eggplants at the Water Rats tonight via ANOTHER leaving do, therefore no car required), so used the opportunity to sort out my handbag (what exactly is all that stuff in there?) and indulge in the luxury of listening to music.  The bag was sorted pretty quickly (Oh, that’s what it all is!) which meant I had a good 25 minutes to lose myself in some Pat Metheny.

What is it about music? Why do some musical progressions just do something to us? When you don't know a piece or track there’s that fantastic one time thing of experiencing a lovely moment of surprise when the direction changes either tonally or rhythmically.  Then when you do know a piece there’s the equally fab feeling when you know that a particularly good modulation / musical change is coming up – you prepare for it - and wait  - and when it happens the joy, tension, wretchedness, whatever it does to you is just so thoroughly satisfying.  

When I’m listening on my lovely PocketPC (NB. new version out soon – check this out – its just too sexy for words …) I find myself smiling to myself sometimes in public places; I almost want to grab people and share it with them - of course they would think I was bonkers. (But Jools, you are bonkers), the reader cries …  When I’m performing its even better, because I’m actively involved in creating the perfect environment for the change to happen; so that the change is prepared for - so that when it happens the surprise or the expectancy is delivered to perfection.  I get to experience it as the provider and the receiver – do you see what I mean?  Possibly not ...

Sometimes wish I was good at musical analysis so I could articulate what I mean in musical terms better.  Obviously I can to certain extent - years spent training as musician etc; but I can't really hold my own with the big boys.  And anyway part of me wants to leave it mysterious, just savour the emotional effect it has on me and just lose myself in the music.  

Whatever, it’s a damn fine way to start the day.

Yum yum!

So, the pile of CDs has diminished, the ironing has been obliterated, shopping completed, blah, blah, blah so there’s not much to say!  Actually, I just wanted to post something so I could tell you about my yummy dinner!

The menu
Dinner:  roast duck breast (nice and pink in the middle) with a tangy port and orange sauce (made with a stonkingly good homemade chicken stock), parmesan roasted parsnips, organic carrots and steamed brocolli.  Soon to be followed by Jools’ famous Strawberries (with a dash of Cointreau) and mascarpone cream.

GEYFH!

My Thursday “headache” had started on Wednesday, and in spite of having not much to show for it, it was still with me yesterday and a small mountain of feminax had been consumed. This is all really annoying because I went through a phase when it wasn’t too bad, but over recent months its all been escalating again. It can only think that it is indeed a case that my level of stress dictates how bad I feel in that respect – I have been trying to convince myself over the years that that wasn’t the case – bugger, it’s my own fault...

Anyway, after work on Friday I followed GVS’s advice to “GEYFH”; apropos of nothing ICQ at work is a great thing – its great for the odd bit of letting off steam, random poetry conversations, footwear discussions and in spite of what you might think actually contributes to productivity! So I did exactly as instructed in the HITW with my old work team who it was lovely to see again. Much Pinot Grigio, chips, gossip and fun later I crawled into bed in the early hours, content in the knowledge that I appeared to have banished the “headache”. Unfortunately it was just in hiding (giving me a few hours off – bless!) so having been woken up at 0530 by its insistent return plus a head packed full of stuff again (GEYFH only works for a while it seems!), I heated my lavender heat pack thing, curled up with a cup of camomile tea and went on line.

Happily the shark and my time zones coincided for c. 10 mins so we had a bit of a natter (therapy session …) before she went to bed and I then spent a good 3 hours just surfing. I wasn’t looking for anything in particular just checking out what my friends are listening to and blogging about at the moment. I also downloaded a trial voice dialling program for my beautiful PocketPC so I can get my “7 of 9” style Bluetooth headset up and functioning in a totally hands free way. Currently I can only use it to take incoming calls when I’m driving and still have to make outgoing calls by pushing buttons on the handset - which is not of course legal ... I then realised that the day had pretty much kicked in and considered the things I needed to do that day.

Well, the brain presented me with the list but my body was unable to comply so I took some more Feminax and spent yesterday pretty much as vegetable, curled up with my lavender pack. I did manage to rustle up some lunch, which was followed by Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy on DVD; I actually nodded off at one point during this, though I don’t think I really missed anything as it was all a bit disappointing to be honest. That was followed by Ant and Dec (I do love them dearly the lovely little boys, but you can tell that I must have been feeling really bad to be watching Saturday night TV!). I then had a spot of dinner and watched another DVD – Robots; this one I really enjoyed and didn’t fall asleep, though TH did. Wonder when our time zones are going to coincide …? Anyway, an early night followed and an early morning dawned with the “headache” gone. I feel like BloominJools again. Thank the Lord for that!,

However, the upshot of a damn lazy day is that the weekend’s chores now all need to be crammed into one day. Argh! So, I breakfasted while sorting through what looked like a decade’s worth of unopened post and created a huge bag of stuff to take to the recycling centre, I had a happy 10 minutes leafing through the latest Lakeland Plastics catalogue and sorted through the mountain of telephone directories that seem to have accumulated somehow. It was in the process of doing that that I found a CD that I’d been looking for (Rustavi) and I’ve now stalled on the jobs that need to be done because I decided that as I’d found it, I should rip it into iTunes before I mislaid it again. I did that, and listened to the whole CD while I was at it, but then got side tracked ripping some other CDs I hadn’t got round to doing. So ever the "time and motion queen" I thought I could do my blog while all that was going on – that’s a good use of the time isn't it?

So, happily through blog and music listening, GEYFH status has been achieved once more which means that the shopping list, shopping, ironing, sorting out my company pension situation and union membership lapse (I was sure I’d sorted that out, but apparently not …) will have to wait until the pile of CDs has gone down ...

The menu (new feature – I’ll only mention it if it was particularly yummy!):
Lunch: feta, tomato, olive & basil salad made with deliciously “tomatoey tasting” home grown tomatoes
Dinner: spicy vegetable fajitas (the tortillas were proper corn ones – hurrah a naturally wheat free meal!)

To post or not to post?

After great deliberation and many long and boring drafts here it is.  There is no satisfying conclusion on this one…

I'm not doing very well at pacing myself at the moment. You'd think that being a Project Manager I'd be able to prioritise and manage my time effectively, and in a work sense – no problem; in a personal sense however...  

Over the last few years I have, in fits and starts, been creeping up my own list of priorities, having always placed myself fairly far down it in the past.  Previously my position has always come after: doing the sensible thing, not upsetting the apple cart and keeping everyone happy, in the misguided belief that the side effect would be that I might also be happy. Potty logic I know … Anyway, to cut a very long and boring story short, I now find myself in a position right at the top of my agenda with the new resolve not to squander any more time and to do my utmost not to keep putting off happiness.

Trouble is that I now have lots of things I want to do and because I’ve wasted so much time in the past I’m doing the daft thing of trying to cram it all in at once: new job / challenge (this is proving to be a steep yet strangely pleasurable learning curve), meeting new people, properly keeping in touch with people I already know, going to the gym, finally getting round to learning to Salsa, doing more singing, enjoying the benefits of living in London, ie. going to events etc (which I’ve not done enough of so far and which I am aware is a crime after living here for 14 years), volunteering for Crisis this Christmas, preparing for the Inca Trail next year, allowing myself the luxury of time alone and most importantly nurturing and preserving my important relationship.

Now, all of this involves hard work, late nights, and a serious investment of emotional effort and essentially because I’m trying to do it all at once I’m exhausted - trouble is I don’t want to leave any of it out …
    

To blog, or not to blog?

For those who worry that because I haven’t posted anything for a couple of days that I’m giving up blogging – I’m not! I am writing a blog, but I’m not sure if I should post it. I’ll continue to write it and make up my mind when I’m finished … It may be just one of those things that needs to be emptied from my head but not actually posted!

Of course this wouldn’t have been a problem back in the early days when no-one was reading this would it?

On a very happy note – I’ve just booked tickets to see Bill Bailey at the Dome in Brighton as an early birthday treat to myself. Now all that needs to happen is that TH doesn’t get a job that night …

Mission Accomplished!

I woke up thinking of the moon again this morning. It had really lifted my spirits the night before, yet an emotionally draining morning yesterday, followed by a PPT session, topped off with a late night at the Thames Festival were conspiring against me in my quest to get ready for a hardcore shopping mission with Lou. I was almost on the point of calling the day off (rare for me as I hate messing people about) when happily a spirit lift happened upon me again in the form of the accidental 'running on' of iTunes into "And he shall purify" from Handel's Messiah. I've not listened to it for wee while now and had forgotten how fantastic it is, especially when you're actually performing it; but listening or performing it really does make the heart soar.  So about 40 bars into the it, the quest was back on and I was up and raring to go. Great stuff!  

A serious day's shopping followed with Lou. She turned up looking like she was going on an expedition! Now I had a rucksack with me, but apart from a book and my corkscrew (never leave home without one …) it was empty, the point being that the day’s purchases could be packed in there. Lou’s rucksack however was full of thermals, scarves, woolly hats, emergency provisions and a particularly beautiful new umbrella which now apparently creates a requirement for a new pair of pink leather gloves; that’s her excuse and she’s sticking to it!

Unusually for an Oxford Street trip my mission’s objectives were fully accomplished and with only one moment of shop rage; why do some of these shops have to play the damn music SO LOUD?? Making a decision through high volume R&B is impossible for me. Anyway, the Jane Norman changing room escape aside I actually managed to get everything I went out for. Result!

As usual I ended up with a few non essential items chucked in for good measure, plus had a cheeky flirtation with a pair of sophisticated Roland Cartier boots which were sadly well out of my league. So far out that I didn’t even try them on; I just stroked them and drank in their gorgeousness. Trying boots on that I can’t afford and don’t need is actually just the slippery slope to buying them, especially in light of my “footwear problem”.

I blame my Saturday job. I used to work in a shoe shop and even though I only worked one day per week the company remarkably awarded me the same discount deal as full time employees – 20% off all footwear and 50% of any shoes that were black or grey, as they were classed as “uniform”. You can imagine the temptation … My Dad became increasingly cross with the volume of shoes and boots which I brought home. One day in a fit of frustration he flung open my wardrobe doors and counted the shoe boxes – summary being “15! No-one needs 15 pairs of shoes! It must stop.”

Thoroughly chastised I consoled myself with the fact that while the telling off had been quite bad, imagine what it would have been like if he had realised that there were two pairs of shoes in each box …    

The moon and I

The moon and I had a bit of a moment last night. I turned into concert hall approach on my way to Waterloo after I’d finished at the Thames Festival and was struck by the beautiful sight of a huge, almost full, clear faced golden moon, framed by high buildings and laced with whisps of cloud. I actually stopped in the street to take it in and instinctively looked round for someone to share it with. While the street was bustling with people enjoying the Thames Festival, I realised I was to all intents and purposes on my own, so turned back to enjoy the moment, just me & the moon, alone. I’ve really got to get a digital camera …

The wonderful web of thoughts

I woke up this morning feeling a wee bit melancholy. I’ve not been sleeping well, had the prospect of today being a long day out of the office at a time when I’m far too busy to be out of the office, and opening the curtains revealed a damp and dismal day. So, I was coming out of the house bracing myself for the joys of public transport from South London to Paddington and was trying to find something good to think about the day. And there it was, an enormous spider’s web on a hydrangea positively glistening with plumptuous raindrops. I immediately wanted to take a picture of it, but then immediately remembered how rubbish the camera is on the otherwise fabulous Pocket PC. “I should really have proper digital camera to capture stuff like that” I thought, “If I got a dinky one I could carry it around with me for moments such as this”. However, as I clipped my keys to the inside of my handbag I realised that even if I could afford to treat myself (which I can’t!) I would probably lose it anyway; the fact that I haven’t lost my Pocket PC to date is pretty miraculous. Indeed the only reason I’m not constantly searching for my keys is because of the clever clip which I transfer to which ever handbag I’m using!

This then reminded me of other things I always lose: hankies (I never lose tissues strangely, just hankies), earrings and gloves – about two of those a year. My Mum used to guard against my serial mitten loss via the “mittens on elastic threaded through the sleeves of the coat” technique. Other kids’ mothers had a similar approach at the schools I went to, but they had string rather than elastic. As you can imagine the whole elastic thing opened up new possibilities and before long, at which ever new school I went to, the new kid who didn't speak like everyone else became a spinning top. Two local children would be running round me hanging onto a glove each seeing how fast I could spin and how far the elastic would stretch; then the spinning would be stopped and the gloves released, the inherent property of elastic ensuring their rapid snap back at my wrists … Lets just say that you soon learn to speak in the local accent and even if you never really fit in, the spinning gradually stops.

This whole bunch of thoughts took only moments which is amazing in itself; however, it’s not just the rapidity of thought that is amazing, but the whizzing through of the emotions that are all wrapped up with them.

• Joy: the beauty of the spider’s web


• Smugness: I cleverly have a small clip to prevent constant searching for keys


• Love: Mum


• Anger: cruelty of kids


• Sadness: spending much of life not fitting in


• Smiley: the comical image of me as bizarre spinning top.

Phew! All a bit much for the early morning really.

Then almost as quickly I started to feel the flippin' melancholy creeping up on me again – damn it. So I decided to push everything down except for the joy that there are beautiful things like spider webs in the world. (And that's in spite of my feelings about spiders under the bed!)

Phew!

Spider dealt with!

Of course there is no way of knowing for certain that there weren’t 2 enormous spiders …

********!?

Be very still! There is an enormous spider in my bedroom!

I am sat on the bed typing this and keeping a beady eye on it to check where it moves to.  Bugger – it just moved!  Why do they have to scuttle??  I have drained my glass of water in readiness to do the brave thing and put a glass over it and put it outside like TH does, but I can’t actually bring myself to put my feet on the floor let alone get anywhere near it.  Bugger it just moved again, only now I can’t see where it went. Jeez it shifts fast.  I think it’s underneath the boots which I haven’t got round to putting back in the cupboard … (note to self – must be tidier). No! Bugger, bugger, bugger, it’s just shot under the bed.  There is absolutely no way I’m going to get any sleep now.  “Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for spiders under the bed.  If it’s UNDER the bed, it could easily end up ON the bed, and if it’s ON the bed it could end up on ME.  I know this is completely irrational of me, it’s probably more scared of me than I am of it blah, blah, blah … but its going to have to go some to be more scared than me at the moment.

I’m just going to have to wait here, in the middle of the bed, until TH gets back from his gig and hope that he has a rational suggestion.  I expect he’ll just be really cross with me (I don’t blame him!) but I’m really not moving anywhere until I’ve seen it again, preferably underneath a glass being put out in the garden.  I could be here for some time …

There's a hole ...

So after what felt like 10 leaving do’s jazzshark has gone …  Actually I think it was only 5 (only!) and I was at 4 of them!  It was a bit of a joke at the end – “do you think you might actually go somewhere after one of these do’s or what?”

But it’s happened now – I look forward to reading all about it on the Jazzsharking blog – and I must admit to feeling more than a little bereft.

I had great hopes of doing a farewell verse as Goose Vertica Space has impressed me of late and I felt insanely inspired to do my own sharking tribute.  Thank goodness I didn’t commit the intention to blog, because that would have meant that I really had to do it; if I say I’m going to do it in the blog then I have to do it (that’s my rule).  But I can’t!  I was always rubbish at poetry at school and in spite of chewing several virtual pencils through (of course I didn’t actually try and do it with pen and paper – that’s what a laptop is for!) I only managed an embarrassing variation on “one, two, buckle my shoe”!

The upshot is that I’ve lost the shark to new and exciting waters.  She’s made me laugh on countless occasions, she’s been a shoulder to cry on, she let me sleep in the same house as her while wearing pink lace knickers, she’s educated me in matters jazz (can I imagine my life without Pat Metheny? No!), she’s always encouraging me to sing more (I will – I promise!), she even managed to swing me a job once, she’s made me more addicted to my computer than I already was damn her! And ultimately I think she knows me better than anyone.

I miss you terribly already shark, but with any luck we’ll be back on the IM before we know it and I can just pretend you’re round the corner!

Lots of love

Bloomin

    

Thank the Lord for M & S!

• Cracking gym session.


• Relaxing shower.


• Open bag containing clothes for work.


• That’s all I’m saying.

Time, ticking away ...

There are just never enough hours in the day are there? There are so many things I HAVE to do, which I just have real trouble stacking up against the things I WANT to do. I’m much better than I used to be about making time for me and not being “all consumed” with work and domestic chores, but no matter how much I let things go, that in the past I wouldn’t have – ie. the state of the house, garden and disorganised earrings; I still have great difficulty fitting it all in.

Why is it that this work / life balance is so hard to achieve for me? I think that is something for me to ponder and explore at a deeper level … Either way its just as well that I’m an organised bird, because if I didn’t have:

• lists of stuff to do at work,


• lists of stuff to do at home,


• lists of stuff to do for me


• AND the assistance of my marvellous Pocket PC,

I don’t know how I’d manage anything except getting up, going to work and coming home again!

As it is I’m in the process of drawing up a timetable for Salsa Classes (just got leafleted the other day which was perfect timing!), the gym – gotta keep PPT happy (!), practicing my singing, going to gigs, keeping in touch with friends, applying fake tan, dying my eyelashes (still haven’t managed to do that!), spending time with TH and of course blogging! All this and I haven’t even started looking at the details I’ve had through about my intended Inca Trail Trek next year. Once I start on that it’s going to mean big time fundraising and big time training … Need a bigger Pocket PC!!!

The evil PPT

I don’t wish to be overdramatic but I can’t move my upper body this morning – my hands are fine for typing – phew! but my arms, shoulders and back have pretty much seized up.  This is all on account of my evil Pocket-sized Personal Trainer.  Pocket-sized because whilst within his own proportions he is a big strong lad, he is nevertheless diddy ie. not very tall, I mentioned this once and he wasn’t impressed!  but then I’m not very tall either so I reckon it works fine …    The upshot is that he is “small but perfectly formed.”  That’s OK to say isn’t it?  

Anyway, said PPT gave me the hardest session I’ve had so far on Friday afternoon.  Or maybe I was just being a whimp? Apparently I’d used up all my rests in previous sessions (I do have a tendency to talk a bit …) so I had NO RESTS.  Supersets all over the shop and the pause between the supersets were only as long as it took for the next exercise to be explained.  I’d pushed myself so hard I had sweat dripping off the end of my nose (attractive eh!) and I also had to lie down for 10 minutes before I could even manage to have a shower! Honestly, I can’t quite believe that I pay for such abuse!  

OK, so dramatics over – I do know why I pay for it, its because I enjoy being pushed and a good old natter when he’s not being mean!  I push myself quite hard already, but sometimes when I’m workingout alone I get to 16 reps out of 20 or whatever, catch sight of myself in the flippin’ mirrors they insist on having in these gyms, realise I’m tomato red, grunting and sweating profusely, have an attack of vanity and give up!  No chance of that with the PPT, if I give him a “please let me stop” look, which he interprets as a dirty look, that’s when I hear – “… and another 10”.  I love it!

    

You have no idea ...

… what went into getting the last blog published. Those of you paying attention will already have noticed that it was posted a day later than written – and why was that? I can’t quite believe it myself, but Jools – “the safest browser in the west” got a computer nasty – some pesky spy ware! It didn’t lock down my laptop or damage any system files, it just wouldn’t let me get on to the internet, IM or send and receive emails. As you can imagine I was lost! Not only that, it wouldn’t let any of the other computers on the network do any of that either!

My router very politely suggested I ran a virus scan – hadn’t done one for a wee while so I ran a Norton full system scan and it found 7 nasties lurking – identified as adware and with a theoretical promise the problem was fixable. I proceeded with the delete and repair procedure only to be told that 6 of the files couldn’t be deleted and that I should click on the link to find out how to manually delete them. So, I clicked on the link knowing full well that it was going to try and take me to some webpage somewhere for my instructions. “But the point is …” I’m crying at the computer screen “… I can’t get onto the internet!!!!” So I ran Ad-Aware instead which found 26 nasties – I actually run this once every couple of weeks anyway because it doesn’t matter how careful you are, you still end up with Cookie Tracking rubbish on your machine. I followed the Ad-Aware quarantine and delete procedure and Hey Presto! problem solved. Blog posted! Hurray for a lovely bit of “freeware” which did a better bloomin’ job than Norton for which I pay subscription – not that I really expected it to pick up spy ware in the first place, but its just once it had identified it, it would have been nice if it could something with it! So I just wanted everyone to know what a cracking job Ad-Aware does and that you should all head out to the Lavasoft site and get yourself a copy. Run it regularly, keep it up-to-date and to continue practising safe browsing.

Busy, busy, busy ...

Blimey – no time to blog lately – what’s going on in my world that made that happen all of a sudden? No time to blog lately roughly translates as “No time to myself lately …” or at least no time to myself which didn’t involve doing chores. I must admit that I did only plan on spending an hour working in the garden the other day, but the problem is you make a neat bit and then the bit next to it looks a real mess, so you have to do that bit as well. Before I knew it I’d spent a mammoth 4 hours out there, was sunburned, had a stinking headache and hadn’t showered or packed in readiness for a couple of days away with TH - oops. Either way the time I had earmarked for blogging last weekend was shot – but the garden looks great!

Since my last post then …

I finished work for a week’s annual leave. Hurray! I had a seriously bad week that week. Maybe it’s because I’ve only been there 2 months and the novelty of the new job has worn off, but I don’t feel comfortable enough in my position to be able to bite back at some of the stupid things that go on. Happily on my last day I had lunch (lunch?? How outrageous! the office cries …) with another member of staff who started on the same day as me and we had a couple of glasses of wine (drinking at lunchtime? How outrageous! the office cries …) and a seriously good bitch! It was just the tonic both of us needed I think and we have made a pact to get out and have lunch at least once a fortnight – steady on – we’re going to get seriously frowned upon here!

I had a very sedate Saturday night out with Georgina Mary – we had planned debauched eating, drinking and dancing but ended up drinking, drinking, eating and then me falling asleep in front of Finding Nemo … How embarrassing. Good news is, after a little IM master class, she is now making tentative steps into the world of IM – don’t think she was quite taken with scrobbling, but once her typing is up to speed and we can have a decent conversation, I’ll work on her!

Sunday was spent on the mammoth gardening session and was followed by drinking far too much with friends in their new house (I always end up doing that with them – the evening generally deteriorates into a bottle of Port, especially if I don’t need to drive after …) They’re doing up an old school house (in the country – complete with country smells!) which is great, apart from the “North face of the Eiger” staircase you have to negotiate every time you need a pee … Fine in the normal scheme of things (well, no actually its not really fine – its really scary) but an utter nightmare in the early hangover hours of the day! Thank goodness no-one saw me climbing it on my hands and knees …

After that, TH and I hit the south coast and spent a couple of days in said friends’ cottage. Really lovely little place – with another seriously scary staircase – what is it with these people? However there is no TV – TH was going stir crazy, and no access to the internet – Bloominjools was going stir crazy! I really didn’t think I was addicted to my laptop, but it turns out I am. I couldn’t get online but I still sat with my laptop on my knees like some sort of security blanket. I played a bit of music which TH endured but I don’t think liked (Avishai Cohen) and made some additions to my “farewell Jazzshark” recipe book. I have just finished the book this morning actually and am making arrangements to get it printed out this afternoon – after a session with my Pocket Personal Trainer and before yet another leaving do. So if you’re reading this Ms Shark, it’s on its way!

We had a happy little day trip to France where my lovely summer heat rash attractively bubbled into action … Sun, heat and me don’t mix – I go red and blotchy and very, VERY, ITCHY and remain that way for a couple of days. At this point English summer normally gives in and returns to its usual damp and dismal August state and I then go back to being white again. Hence the fake tan obsession. It’s really embarrassing realising that people aren’t dazzled by your beauty or personality, just the unfeasible whiteness of Bloominjools in a sun top …

Anyway, pleasant lunch in Boulogne was followed by a leisurely stocking up on wine in Calais. Well, it was leisurely right up until the point that I overheard the woman behind me in the queue mention the time … Who had completely forgotten to change her watch on the crossing over in the morning …? Its amazing how the threat of missing the last Seacat back to Dover can focus your mind into making very quick decisions on how many cases of what to buy in the next supermarket on the list! We got to the Seacat just in time to check in thanks to some nifty wrong side of the road driving from TH – phew!

Once back in London, the holiday continued with Philadelphia Story at the Old Vic, which I thoroughly enjoyed – apart from the embarrassingly audible gasp when Mr Spacey made his first entrance. Honestly – it was just silly. I thought the American woman behind me was going to wet herself! Yesterday was spent having a picnic and mooching around Camden Lock (I bought several second hand books and a silly skirt I don’t need!) and then took the River Bus down to Little Venice. A lovely relaxing day.

And now it’s Friday again! And as you can see TH is off with his little white balls and I have had time to do a mammoth blog! I had meant to do the ironing and dye my eyelashes but hey, this has been more fun – for me anyway!

Don't Feminax and drive ...

I wonder what it is about that heady combination of 500mg Paracetamol, 8mg Codeine Phosphate, a quantity of Caffeine Monohydrate equivalent to 50mg anhydrous caffeine and 100mg Hyoscine Hydrobromide which makes it the only non prescription pain killer that hits the spot for me?  I don’t need to kill pain very often, thanks to my usually nutrient rich diet (you can almost see me shining my halo!), but when I get what I call my “Thursday headache” there’s nothing else that works.  Paracetamol on its own doesn’t even get close; Codeine on its own makes me queasy and Ibuprofen only works if it is truly a muscular thing.

Anyway, whatever it is, it kills the pain; trouble is it kills pretty much everything at the same time rendering a girl pretty much useless!  Apart from the fact that the caffeine gives me the shakes and stops me from getting back to sleep if the Thursday headache manifests itself during the night (as happened this morning, hence the early morning blog post), I get this curious feeling that I’m on a skateboard and someone has just pushed me down a long fuzzily lit tunnel.  It’s kind of nice – as long as I don’t try and get off the skateboard ride and have to “do” anything! However, as you can imagine it’s a bit dodgy if you’re going to operate machinery – driving a car is a bit like being on the dodgems, or if you simply have to get some work done.  In my old job the Scotsman always used to know when I’d taken some.  I guess it was the change from grumpy Bloominjools to an “away with the fairies” Bloominjools that gave it away, but he was pretty adept at spotting it and commenting “watch out – she’s on the Feminax again!”

It seems to be a painkiller that lots of people I know are particularly partial to, and I’m not sure its necessarily to do with the painkilling part …  The only downside for Jazzshark in her impending move to NY is that she’s not going to be able to get it in the States, what with Codeine being banned and all that …  The fans of Feminax aren’t just limited to girls either; indeed the Scotsman often refers “fondly” to a period of his life he spent sitting in his pants and living off Feminax and Cider.  I can’t function properly on Feminax on its own, so can’t begin to imagine what it would be like with Alcohol – I’m such a light weight!  

Any road up, at least being awake (and headache free) at the dawn of crack again has meant I’m seeing a beautiful sun rise and I’m getting the opportunity to listen to some music – last track played can be found on my audioscrobbler page.  

Update on the tan ...

Well, the tan is coming on fine – no laptop marks on legs which is marvellous – all my other bits seem to be developing evenly too which always good. TH and I have had a wee BBQ: scallop and bacon kebabs, followed by marinated lamb chops, wheat free sausages lathered in honey and mustard (they need livening up some how …) and veggie kebabs. Strawberries and cream to follow (marinated in lemon juice, balsamic and Cointreau), but that’ll have to wait until TH has re-surfaced. He’s gone for a snooze … had a hard morning with the small white ball and sticks, a BBQ with half a bottle of wine and we’re going out tonight (Amy Kohn at 12 Bar) - pacing is required apparently …

What next? Well, I have so much in my head about Edinburgh that I couldn’t possibly publish it all in one hit, so seeing as no-one really knows that this blog exists I’m going to publish blogs for each day retrospectively. No-one will notice! You’re not reading this are you?          

Gotcha!

That was what I said – in my “outside voice” even though I was in on my own – when I finally managed to get hold of an earring that had fallen down the back of my chest of drawers.  That job formed part of a very satisfying 2 hours of tidying this morning.  Having got out of bed and trodden on my toilet bag – still lying full of stuff some 6 days following my return from Edinburgh – I realised that I really had to get myself sorted out.

So, in a major feat of time and motion, I:

• Sorted out my toiletries, makeup bag and piles of hair products (I’ve inherited a lot of this from jazzshark who couldn’t ship it to NY – apparently someone might have thought that the hair straightening serums were potential explosives ingredients …)


• Untangled all my jewellery – necklaces from earrings etc;


• Washed and intensively conditioned my hair - I’m having a curly week this week so have the joy of letting it dry naturally and do its own “big hair” thing rather than spending an hour persuading it that it really does want to be straight;


• Applied my fake tan (I’ve got a cushion on my lap at the moment to stop the shape of my laptop being irrevocably “tanned” into my legs …);


• Finished the ironing and put everything away.  Phew!

The jewellery was a particularly satisfying job.  For months now I’ve had a collection of single earrings cluttering the place up. Not any more – though I have kept one single because I can’t bear for it to really be a single … As a pair they were one of my favourites, a present from Lulu; I know where I lost it so I’m hoping it’ll turn up at some point when someone has their own tidy up!  Consequently I’m hanging onto it in the hope that it’ll become a pair sometime soon.  

There was another single; the mate for whom I was pretty certain was down the back of the chest of drawers.  How to get at it however?  The chest of drawers is very heavy and I tried a half hearted shove but nothing happened.  I then squished my head against the wall and tried to squint to see if I could make anything out – yup, it was definitely there.  A long poky thing, that’s what I needed.  Now the best “tool” for the job would have been a ruler, but I happened to know that the one I wanted was downstairs and I’m afraid I was overcome with laziness and decided that one of my make up brushes would suffice.  Laziness can lead to bonkers assessments of the suitability of tools obviously …  As expected, it wasn’t long enough and the fluffy brush bit wasn’t really designed for grabbing earrings.  Localised rummaging in my drawer unearthed a pair of scissors.  Longer - but still not long enough.  Brainwave! A hanger.  That was long enough but somehow the hook kept getting in the way.  So, laziness was shoved to one side, and I collected the ruler from downstairs.  Gotcha!  Should have just gone down for the flippin’ ruler in the first place, would have saved a lot of time!  It’s like trying to undo screws with the end of a knife because you can’t be arsed to go and get the screwdriver.  You know its going to take you twice as long as doing the job with the right tool, and that you’ll ruin the knife to boot, but you still do it … Or is that just me?

Anyway, all possible pairs were paired and I was left with a pile of 10 single earrings.  The temptation to keep them just because I like them was quite strong, but I then asked myself what possible use would they be?  I’m not quirky enough to go out wearing non-matching earrings, and the only other possible option would be to keep them for a time when I only have one ear. But that’s just daft.  If I ever end up with just one ear, I’ll damn well treat myself to some new single earrings to make myself feel better.  Anyway, they’re now in the WPB, though I have put some other rubbish on top of them, just in case I spot them and am tempted to sneak some of them back for old time’s sake …

Why is it ...

… that when you have the opportunity to have a Saturday morning lie in you flippin' well wake up at the time you’ve been struggling to wake up at to go to work?  It drives me mad!  I came back home from Edinburgh late Monday night and had to go back to work Tuesday morning.  Bad planning I know, but what with one thing and another I haven’t got enough leave to take any more time off.  To be honest if I had taken the Tuesday off the temptation to spend another day in Edinburgh rather than be sensible and use the day to sleep, do washing, sort out the mess that always ensues after a few days away living out of a suitcase, would have been far too great I’m sure.

So there I am, bang, awake at 6.45am.  Now I don’t mean just gently coming round with the capacity to drift in and out for a couple of hours in that lovely way you can on a Monday; no I mean BANG! I’m totally awake and there is loads of stuff in my head that I should do.  So here I sit, a hive of industry, in my lovely living room in my favourite arm chair – the one by the window which means I can gaze at the view periodically.  I have backed up my work laptop (haven’t done it since I started the new job 6 or so weeks ago – bad Jools!), read a few of the regular blogs I now read – bassman, the Marquis, Richard Herring (on the recommendation of jazzshark – go on girlie, get your website and blog going!) and am writing my own Blog – obviously ....

The peace has now been shattered by TH getting up and promptly putting on the TV – it’s always on, even when there is absolute rubbish on (much of the time in my opinion), though when the rubbish is on, the TV is often on with the sound turned down.  WHY???   Well, I guess I had an hour and half to myself …  

I really want to post some nice words on bassman’s forum about his Ed show, but for some reason I’m having a confidence crisis about posting them publicly.  I could do it fairly easily by e-mail – to him personally – but the thought of putting my thoughts on his site and people I know reading them is spooking me.  I know I’m doing a blog – but no-one I know knows it is there!  Or do they …?  Why is it I’m struggling with it I wonder?  What I’m going to do is to type an e-mail to him and then at the last minute fox myself and by cutting and pasting it into his forum instead of sending the e-mail …  I wonder if I’ll be able to pull the wool over my eyes?

I’ve just realised that I haven’t even mentioned Ed yet.  That was what I meant to write about but today’s post is already boringly long so maybe I should re-group and do it at the dawn of crack tomorrow.  Its Sunday after all, which means I’m bound to be awake really early plus TH will be off hitting a small white ball with various long sticks so I’ll not be trying to do it through the sound of the TV.  Sounds like a plan to me!
    

Edinburgh: 12th merges into 13th

So Friday dawned bright and early, for me at any rate … Gradually various of the housemates got up, and then went back to bed again! The shark and I headed off into town – we walked in which I thought was great, I love to explore places on foot; not sure Jazzshark would agree – she’s more of a taxi shark really! We had a lovely healthy lunch in Henderson’s, found a fringe guide from which to swipe a map and prepared to explore Edinburgh. I realised soon into lunch that the shark was flagging so let her off the hook (she went home to have a rest – but then she had had 4 days head start on me!) and headed off with my map to explore Edinburgh.

I bought knickers - I nearly came away without any and realised just at the last minute! However the handful I grabbed from the drawer and stuffed into my case weren’t all "appropriate" so I had to get some more – not sure the shark (with whom I was sharing a bed!) was impressed with the shocking pink lacy numbers I got, but I like them! I also bought needless earrings all of which I love.

I headed up to the Royal Mile and built up quite a collection of fliers – I don’t think I ended up going to any of the shows – they all seemed to clash with stuff I was already planning on doing – but its was interesting seeing the variety of stuff on offer. I found a pharmacy to stock up on Feminax (the shark and I had both run out …) and found a beautiful red velvet bag at the craft market. I persuaded myself I didn’t need it and that I also didn’t need the far more practical (but still unnecessary) black one (don't be impressed by this seeming display of self control - 3 more shopping days left before going home!) and headed back to the Assembly Rooms to meet C, BB and Katie for Monty Python’s Flying Circus (in French). This was great fun – as variable in its funniness as I found the original Monty Python stuff to be honest – ie. some was a fab and some a bit rubbish. As a non-existent French speaker the sub titles helped for some of the stuff I couldn’t quite remember but didn’t always manage to keep up with the pace. I had an ice cream in the auditorium (haven’t done that in years), helped Katie nudge BB awake – he always falls asleep in shows apparently, and managed not to get soaked in the Marathon for Incontinence sufferers sketch.

After that, a brisk walk to a pub near St Brides (Acoustic Music Centre) with BB to meet Petter (Swedish drummer of Stekpanna amongst others) and let him have keys to the flat so he could crash out and tend to his “visitors” (more of that later …) After that and an interesting conversation about the lack of a drum kit for the gigs (more of that tomorrow) there was a quick sprint to St Brides itself so I could learn a new skill – lacing Corliss Randall into her corset. I wonder why it is, that as a woman, you’re expect to “just know” how to do stuff like that? I had no clue – why would I? I have nothing to shove up with a corset anyway … Well I know what to do now, and pretty damn good I am too! I can also satisfactorily pull a Mae West wig onto another person (not as easy as it should be) and generally be a bit of a backstage dresser. Either way Mae West was happy (fascinating to see her emerge bit by bit as her costume went on) and BB was happy too – it meant that he didn’t have to do it (!), corset engineer not being a skill he was particularly looking to add to his CV … I watched the first small bit of the show then hopped in a taxi and headed over to the Pleasance to meet the shark to see Richard Herring.

Richard Herring was good in parts and not in others I felt. It was a smiley gig rather than a belly laugh gig and to be honest I think he’s a better writer than a performer. There was something almost apologetic about the way he delivers his material. You can read the same stuff on his blog and be rotfl but it didn’t quite hang together as well when he was delivering it live. It was still worth doing though. After that there was small gin break followed by Pajama Men. What can I say …? I was completely lost for the first 10 minutes and then I got it! Its fast paced, very, very clever and they were well deserving of their standing ovation that night. Reviews are mixed, but I guess its one of those kind of love it or loathe it shows. Either way the “wagging finger” and “gross” became big part of the vernacular for the rest of the trip.

No time for a gin break now – so we just headed straight over to the Spiegel Tent for La Clique. I usually hate this sort of stuff, but the shark was so full of praise for it from the year before that it had to be done. And it is great stuff, especially where we were standing – I don’t think I would have wanted to be sitting actually. I surprised myself that I liked it and was inordinately disappointed that I wasn’t chosen to be swung round by the roller skating act that closed the show. The shark thought I was mad to want to do it – she was weighing up the “risk assessment” problems with the whole bit of that show! But I think it would have been great. Anyway – I didn’t get the chance; they got another girl out of the crowd instead who looked absolutely terrified and seemed to be cutting the circulation off on the woman performer’s arm she was gripping so tight!

Well, day over – we couldn’t persuade anyone to come over to the Spiegel Gardens and have a drink so we headed back to the flat for a drink instead. And that should have been that … When we got home all the windows were open. Now, it wasn’t a cold night, but by 2am it wasn’t particularly warm either, so why are the windows open? Well, turns out that Petter had been treating his hair for a little case of the nits which he got from his lovely daughter Engla. Bless her! The shark immediately started scratching her head! I must admit even though you know you haven’t got them you do still find yourself having a scratch subconsciously … We were most interested about what the BB and Petter bed-share dynamic was going to be! I think the shark made some comment about BB needing my pink lace knickers (she really wasn’t impressed with them) to put on his head to guard against infestation, which I’m afraid to say, at 4am and after much gin and wine had me in absolute fits. You know when you just get the giggles and can’t stop? Jazzshark was laughing at me laughing and I was laughing at her laughing at me, and the whole thing dissolved into hysteria. It wasn’t really very funny but our chuckle muscles obviously needed a serious work out!